Caught in the Series

Apparently, I ought to change residences. Well, obviously I ought to change residences. But I've found the residence I would prefer to be living in may not be the one that fits my current lifestyle best. Instead, I've just finished reading about my future.....

You see, I am job-hunting. And though that sounds (and sometimes feels) like I'm equipped with a rifle, strange attire, and boots that weigh more than I do, I am only looking for a job. And, I hope, one is looking for me too. (And when I meet the right one, we'll fall in love and work happily ever after.) In my job-hunting, I sometimes submit resumes, and, on rarer occasions, I go on interviews.....this whole thing has been an unpleasant and unfruitful experience but it has the potential to get worse. And that's what I love about Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events. Things always get worse but they always remain comically pathetic.

"Besides getting several paper cuts in the same day or receiving the news that someone in your family has betrayed you to your enemies, one of the most unpleasant experiences in life is a job interview."

Agreed.

"It is very nerve-wracking to explain to someone all the things you can do in the hopes that they will pay you to do them."

Impossible.

"I once has a very difficult job interview in which I had not only to explain that I could hit an olive with a bow and arrow, memorize up to three pages of poetry, and determine if there was poison mixed into cheese fondue without tasting it, but I had to demonstrate all these things as well."

I've been on that interview. I didn't get the job.

"In most cases, the best strategy for a job interview is to be fairly honest, because the worst thing that can happen is that you won't get the job and will spend the rest of your life foraging for food in the wilderness and seeking shelter underneath a tree or the awning of a bowling alley that has gone out of business...."

Look for future headlines: Big Foot Found Bowling; Has Human DNA Matching Local Blogger.